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Featured Article:
Three ways to build a better online
dating profile.
1) Avoid Negativity Have you ever gone out on a first date where
the person you were with complained about his/her work, ex, etc?
Such negative talk is a major turnoff. Likewise, negativity is a
major turnoff in your profile. Being positive is like a magnet.
Being negative is like wearing a skunk aroma. Here's how one person
actually began her profile:
"To be quite honest, I have been putting this off
as long as possible. I have friends who use Match and have had some
terrible dates."
This begs to ask, "what are you doing here?" Now
contrast that to this profile introduction:
"I've heard online dating is a great way to meet
awesome people and that's why I want to meet you."
Which one of these
profile intros is more attractive? The one who wants to date
"losers" or the one that wants to date "winners"? Psychologically
everyone wants to be a winner. Therefore in your profile, avoid
anything negative like the plague. Be positive.
If you have anything negative in your profile ("I
hate country music," "the last guy I dated was a liar and cheater,"
"I'm sick of being alone," "I'm sick of the bar scene," etc.) then
go edit it out immediately and replace it with something positive
("I love independent music and artists, like..."). Always be
positive; not just in your profile, but also in life.
2) Go From Typical to
Unique
Read this profile
and tell me if you recognize it:
"I am a fun person who loves movies and music. I
like walks on the beach, good conversation, and dining out. I'm
looking for someone who is fun and can make me laugh."
Unfortunately, the above describes most profiles -
typical and non-informative. Beef up your profile to be more
descriptive and unique. Instead of "I like movies," say "my favorite
movie is ____ because _______" or use a movie character to describe
you. "I'm a lot like _____ in ______ because _______."
Use clever words that are descriptive. Instead of
saying "on hot days I like to go to the ocean or on a hike," say,
"on a sizzling day my adventurous side leads me to traversing the
ocean on a sailboat or discovering a new waterfall that I can cool
off under."
Instead of "I like to discover new things," say,
"I'm a lot like Indiana Jones in that I love exploring the mysteries
of life, while educating my mind to appreciate new things."
Strive to make your profile unordinary by spicing
it up sentence by sentence. Be descriptive, unique, and fun!
3) Filter Out Unwanteds
Your profile
isn't about getting responses. It is about getting responses from
the type of person you are attracted to. Therefore, use descriptions
to help narrow your focus to what you want so that you get responses
from who you're looking for.
Instead of "I'm looking for someone fun and
humorous," say, "I'm looking for a lighthearted man between the ages
of 24 and 29 who enjoys the humorous side of life. If you are
clean-shaven and can hold a conversation during a 150 mile car
journey, then we may be a match. Email me."
In the above example, you created three filters -
an age filter (24 and 29), and appearance filter (clean-shaven) and
a communication filter (good-communicator). And you did it without
offending. But you also created a response filter ("...we may be a
match. Email me.") You've helped tell the person what the next step
is if they meet your criteria. You've created a call to action,
which will help direct interested parties to email you versus
waiting.