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Safe Sex-Fun Condom Sayings

Cover your stump before you hump
Before you attack her, wrap your whacker
Don't be silly, protect your willy
When in doubt, shroud your spout
Don't be a loner, cover your boner
You can't go wrong if you shield your dong
If you're not going to sack it, go home and whack it
If you think she's spunky, cover your monkey
If you slip between her thighs, be sure to condomize
It will be sweeter if you wrap your peter
She won't get sick if you wrap your dick
If you go into heat, package your meat
While you're undressing venus, dress up your penis
When you take off her pants and blouse, slip up your trouser mouse
Especially in December, gift wrap your member
Never, never deck her with an unwrapped pecker
Don't be a fool, vulcanize your tool
The right selection will protect your erection
Wrap it in foil before checking her oil
A crank with armor will never harm her
If you really love her, wear a cover
Don't make a mistake, cover your snake
Sex is cleaner with a packaged wiener
If you can't shield your rocket, leave it in your pocket
No glove, no love
If you think she'll sigh, cover old one eye
Even If she's eager, protect her beaver
No one likes a horses ass, protect yourself at climax
Shield her from the hunt until you shoot her in the cunt
Avoid a frown, contain your clown
Harness the pygmy man before entering the bearded clam
Constrain the little head before you stick it in the shed
Put a condom on your dink before you dart it in her sink
The weasel you must surround before you please her on the ground
Cloak the joker before you poke her
Encase that torch before you paint her porch
Cape your throbber before you bob her
After detection sheath your erection
Before you penetrate hide your magistrate
Don't surprise her plug your Geyser
Cover that lumber before you pump her
Protect her wrinkle before you sprinkle
She won't bristle if you wrap your whistle
House your noodle then release your strudel
Put your dog in the pound and make her yelp like a hound
Shelter your jerky then nab that turkey
Cage that snake then shake and bake
Cover your peter it will be much neater
Coat that Labrador then allow him to explore
It's always funky to cage your monkey
It won't be funny with a coatless dummy
It won't be fun with an unwrapped thumb
It's not much money to catch your honey
Don't be a fool cover your tool
Hood that match then scratch that thatch
Stitch that switch then itch her niche
Wrap that tool to catch the drool
It ain't no jibe to protect her hive
Contain that sputum before you use him
Restrain your log then plow her bog
Glove your pecker before you check her
Coat that slimmer before you prime her
Condomize then womanize (or sodomize)
Cover old pete then grind her meat
Guard your peter before you meet her
Check your list before you tryst
Wrap your bate before you mate
Can your worm before you squirm
Cover your pipe you dumb ass wipe
Contain your lizard then tickle her gizzard
Bag the mole then do her hole
Cuff your carrot before you share it
Jail your number then call the plumber
Cover your vein then drive her insane
Wrap that pickle then slip her a tickle
Protect your dink then fluff her mink
Restrain your lantern then stick it in her cavern
Hide ole harry then take her cherry
Wrap that spout then bore her out
Conceal your train don't cause her pain
Guard your bridge then do her ridge >
Shroud your trout then make her shout
To make her squat like a turkey, cover your Jerky
Box your blister then poke her in the whiskers
Wrap your spout to catch the trout
Plug your funnel then enter the tunnel
Cover your steamer before you ream her
Protect that fish then dip it in the dish
Contain that bass for a swim in her glass
Be sure to wear it to feed her ferret
Clothe the boner before you hone her
Got no protection? Can't use your erection!
Cork your pump or you don't hump
No unwrapped stags get between my legs
Dress that erection to make a deflection
Contain that shanker before you spank her
Cap that seeder before you breed her
Stop the stream before you cream
Secure that ladder then drain your bladder
Protect your screw to catch that glue
Package your meat for a real neat treat
Holster your gun then shootings more fun
Canvas that trailer before you nail her
Garage the tractor then attack her
Net that grass hopper before you pop her
Sock that wanger before you bang her
Pen that rooster, she'll be much looser
Trim your hardwood then do her real good
Garnish your oak then give her a poke
Pouch your associate then go fornicate
Smother your affiliate before you ejaculate
Confine your fascinate before it regurgitates
Catch that goat before it bloats
Ensnare that barbarian then do her abdomen
Restrain your hammer then wam bam her
Prune that stalk then make her squawk
Wrap that rod then please her bod
Sheath that knife she ain't your wife
House that bottle then mash her throttle
Sash that hash then thrash that gash
Cover your diddle then fiddle her middle
Can your knob then throb her swab
Contain old Doug then clean her rug
Cover your limb before you swim
Retain your bailer then impail her
Rope your dope then make some soap
Net your salamander then make salad in her
Cap your flapper then sniff her snapper
Wrap that Steed then trample her weeds
Hat that chef then scramble her cleft
Cover your stone before you bone
House your hose then curl her toes
Saddle your penis then straddle her mean ass
Blanket your twitch then hump that bitch
Shield your rocks then pond her box
Cover old sly then do her dry
Wrap your rail then fill her pail
Glove your chimney before you come in me
If your nude tube your dude
Cloak your hitter then go split her
Wrap your nipper before you dip her
Can your spam then bam that mam
Corral your ram then slice her ham
Sheath your sliver then jab her liver
Twist your wick then stick that prick
Cover old Bart then dart her tart
Shed old spot then do her slot
Drawer your pip then split her lips
Contain that leach then mash her peach
Bag your elm then take the helm
Constrain your gem to catch the flem
Catch that head cheese or I won't spread these
Constrain that agate you ain't no faggot
Survey your land then plant her stand
Before you drive her protect that diver
Sack that slimy smelt then tan her beaver pelt
Wrap that stiffer then let him sniff her
Cover you post then slice her roast
Blanket old juicy then plug old loosey
Balloon your baboon the moon tune her poon
Contain that viper before you pipe her

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